Stepping into the Call of God

While Paul was seeing God move so wonderfully in the South Island of New Zealand, I was in Sydney working with the Christian Television Association. How I got to be there is a testimony to the intervention of God in our lives. It is wonderful to look back and see the Lord's Hand so clearly on your life, even though you may not be aware of it at the time.

From a very young age my dream had been to be an actress. I trained for stage work with the Independent Theatre in Sydney and for radio work with Rosalind Kennadale's Radio Academy and was doing professional acting from the age of eleven. My eyes were on television and ultimately the big screen. I was doing well and everything was going towards this plan. I had no idea that the Lord had other plans.

Quite independently from these ambitions (at least that's what I thought), around the age of fourteen or fifteen I began to wonder about the reality of God. Although my parents were not church-goers, I had been sent to Sunday School, but as I reached my mid-teens I began to seriously want to know the truth. Many people I knew, who said they believed in God, didn't act as though He mattered in their lives at all. Some went to church each Sunday, but it was as though He was non-existent the rest of the week. To me that did not add up.

"If there is a God" I thought, "surely He should be the most important person in our life."

I began to pray earnestly. Every night I would get on my knees and cry out from my heart...

"God, if you are real, show yourself to me."

For three months or so I cried out like this. Then, getting no response, I began to think that it must be that God does not exist. Right at that time a friend of my parents came to stay for a short time with us. One day, when there were just the two of us in the house, knowing she believed in God I asked her why. She mentioned the wonder of all that He had created.

"I can't believe God created everything" I said. "It sounds too much like a fairy story".

She began to explain more but, to this day, I have no idea what she said for suddenly the light had dawned.

"What a fool I've been" I thought, "I've been thinking of God limited like a man. If God is God of course he can create. He wouldn't be God otherwise".

Our friend suddenly said, "I must go down to the shops" and she was gone. I was left alone in our lounge room. It is hard to put into words the wonder that filled my heart as the Presence of God filled the room. I got on my knees and gave Him everything that belonged to me. I gave him my purse, laughing because there was nothing in it. I gave him my dog. I gave him my life. I thanked Jesus for coming and dying for me. In my mind's eye I saw all the believers lined up down through the centuries and I had the strong awareness that I had stepped forward and joined the line.

There was no thought in my mind that I was giving up my ambitions. With joy I added the Lord to my plans. I would be the best actress as a Christian, was my thinking now. I would be His witness in the entertainment business. Several years passed. I was growing in my relationship with the Lord and also as an actress. I was getting regular roles in radio plays and in the theatre and, at the age of eighteen, it seemed as though the world was at my feet. Soon I would step into the "big time". Then one day the Lord challenged me to give Sundays fully to Him. That was all He asked for...just Sunday. As I look back now I understand the "cleverness" of the Lord. He did not ask me for the whole week. Just the one day. But that one day, I was soon to learn, represented my whole life.

A very short time later, much to my joy, I got a call to take the leading role in one of the Independent Theatre plays. This was what I had been waiting for! As I enthusiastically answered the invitation a whisper came to my heart "Remember - Sundays are mine" and I knew I had to speak up. Nervously, I told the producer,

"I want the part very much. Just one thing though - I've become a Christian. I can't rehearse on a Sunday".

I was amazed at her answer. No problem, she assured me. She very much wanted me for the part so she'll organise it so we don't have to rehearse on a Sunday. I was overjoyed.

We met together for the first rehearsal. As the producer walked into the gathering of the actors she announced with great frustration...

"I can't believe it. I've never experienced this in all my years in the theatre. The only day we can get for rehearsal is Sunday!" And looking at me, "Bunty won't you please change your mind?" All the actors eyes were fixed on me.

I shook my head, feeling amazed at myself at what I was doing.

"I can't" I said, "I can't rehearse on a Sunday."

You could feel the shock waves around the room. This just was never done! The producer tried to persuade me. She really wanted me for the part, she said. She continued, many times, asking me to change my mind and each time I said "no" more peace filled my heart.

The part was given to someone else. The actors shook their heads in disbelief at me. As we left, one of them came up and took my hand.

"It's been nice knowing you, Bunty" he said.

"I'm not going anywhere" I replied. It still never enter my head that I was giving up acting. I was just filled with joy at being obedient to the Lord.

Three months went by and I heard nothing from the theatre. No calls came offering roles. I heard on the grapevine that the play I had rejected had been cancelled. And I smiled with the Lord. I would never have had the part anyway. But I began to feel anxious at the lack of calls. Then one came...from the same producer. A one-day reading. "A religious play", she said.

I did not realise what had happened within my spirit at my act of obedience and during the three months that followed, but as I arrived at the theatre and began to walk down the long entrance...a walk I had taken so many times before...a strange feeling filled me. I felt as though I was walking out of light into darkness. As I sat in the foyer with the other actors, waiting the arrival of the producer, I felt so uncomfortable, so out-of-place. The producer arrived and, coming straight to me, whispered wonderful words in my ear...

"I've come to know Him, too!" she said.

Several years later I would meet her again, giving her testimony to the hundreds of people in the St Stephens church in Sydney and over TV, as I helped produce CTA's program "Wednesday at St Stephens".

I was so relieved when the reading was over and I could leave the theatre. As I walked up the long way out I felt like I was walking out of darkness into light. I stood outside "drinking in" the sunlight.

"Lord," I said, "I will never go back there again!"

The Lord, in His great wisdom, had ask me for just one small act of obedience....give Him Sunday. But on that one small act His grace had got to work and He had taken out of me all my ambition and love of acting. My life now was totally His. I was now on the threshold of His plan and purpose for my life.

A short time later I received the invitation to work with the Christian Television Association and have the joy of seeing the Gospel message go out over the TV waves. It was there that the challenge to the missionfield would come. It was there I was to meet Paul and it was from there, together with him, I was ultimately to fulfill the call of God.